Honestly Dad

Remaining parent,
for fifty years I was your daughter
Before you remembered me.

I adored you from my first moment
Pictures of me gazing into your hazelnut eyes,
My baby blues crinkled all smiles

when you walked into the room

Honestly Dad
You needed your newspaper, I needed my daddy.
Did you really have to toss me out of your easy chair?

You taught me to ride my first bike.
You took off just one of the training wheels.
I crashed into the rose bush.

Remember when we went to the Father/Daughter Dance?
The year was 1967
I was a ten-year old in a lime green mini dress.

We didn’t dance but we were together.
That was really nice.
The most handsome daddy in the world.

Remember when we went to buy my first car?
1971 Ford Maverick three on the tree.
I had never driven a manual transmission before.

You pointed the car up the hill, such a challenge
Trying to time it all perfectly to impress you with my driving skills.
It worked so much better when we turned the car around.

Honestly Dad

I wanted to follow in your successful footsteps
If I was a state forester like you, we’d have so much to talk about
“That’s a poor career choice for women” was your reply.

Remember when I tried to be a model in the big city?
I sent you a glossy black and white photo of ME
Eight and a half by eleven, all framed up

The glass was shattered in transit from Chicago to northern Minnesota
My life and my heart broken in pieces 1984
I think you got to see what I looked like anyway.

You walked me down the aisle and gave me away two times
The third time you couldn’t make it to the wedding
And that’s OK.

Thirty years since I left home
You never called me
You quickly passed the phone to Mom when I called

Now you call me every week
Honestly Dad
Why did it take Mom’s passing for you to remember me?



13 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Shawn Bird
    Apr 12, 2013 @ 11:33:16

    “fifty years I was your daughter /Before you remembered me.” Powerful line!


  2. Bunn
    Apr 12, 2013 @ 11:50:09

    Very dramatic! So true!


  3. asmallbutmeaningfullife
    Apr 12, 2013 @ 13:01:29

    Honestly Natalie, this just reaches inwards and grabs hold of your heart.


    • Natalie
      Apr 12, 2013 @ 13:53:51

      Dear Small but Meaningful, honestly I could have gone deeper with this, but I have forgiven my dad for a lot of stuff, so better not to dredge it all up again…


  4. Dianna
    Apr 12, 2013 @ 14:28:26

    Oh, wow, Natalie. This is so, so powerful. And yes, I can read between the lines. My dad died when I was 8 months old….


    • Natalie
      Apr 12, 2013 @ 14:39:23

      Dear Dianna, I’m so sorry about your daddy. Honestly, I am blessed to have my dad still walking around on earth, even if he’s an imperfect hermit. I love him.


  5. charliesixty
    Apr 12, 2013 @ 14:58:14

    This is SO very much likes men from that time frame…. My dad had many similar characteristics – and yes, though, I miss him — he’s been gone since 1991, but there are times I know he’s watching and caring …. Good work, Natalie….


  6. jeff noel
    Apr 14, 2013 @ 14:25:18

    Intense. Honest. Great combo. Peace and blessings to you both Natalie. Thank you for your courage to share.


    • Natalie
      Apr 15, 2013 @ 09:43:11

      Thank you, Jeff. This whole poetry thing has sure got me in a introspective, maybe even circumspective mood. Thanks so much for jumping in with us!


  7. Dagmara Almand
    Apr 20, 2013 @ 10:03:16

    thanks for sharing that.
    truly appreciated it… very touching


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