“I Can’t Hear What You’re Saying!”

Dear Mother Goose, here’s my problem…
When my husband is talking, I see his mouth opening and closing, but I can’t hear the words that he is saying! Do you think I need hearing aids or could this be a sign of a deeper problem? signed “Fingers Stuck in My Ears”

A common problem in March

Dear Fingers, Honk honk! This is a very common problem for married couples in the month of March. Those of us in the advice-column world refer to this phenomena as “TOLTY Syndrome”. You can look it up in the medical journals, but I will tell you right now that “TOLTY” stands for “Tired Of Listening To You”. The reason this syndrome is common in March remains a mystery, but one thing is for certain, installing hearing aids in your ears will not help at all.

Here is some advice from the heart of Mother Goose: you need to find a new way to listen to your husband. You must rekindle the passion of your ears. Reinvent the art of listening so that every word which falls from your husband’s lips is refreshing and lovely to your ears. I would suggest this new “listening” position as a way to jumpstart your hearing ability — bend over at the waist, being careful not to hurt yourself, of course, and peek between your legs at your husband. Viewing him from this unusual angle will not only improve your hearing, but could possibly cause your husband to say some new and very interesting things.

I hope that you will try this, dear Fingers. Mother Goose cares. A lot.

And to all of my other precious readers, Mother Goose is here to help you with your problems too. Please send your emails to ncramer1216@gmail.com and my assistant, Natalie, will forward them along to me. She’s such a blessing…

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7 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Bunn
    Mar 02, 2012 @ 12:09:48

    I just love your advice to fingers in her ears!!
    Not that I’m having those kind of problems but
    I believe listening to my husband with my head between my legs would really help our conversation!!
    Thanks for such good advice!

    Reply

  2. Natalie
    Mar 02, 2012 @ 12:47:56

    I would like to add that Mother Goose is definitely NOT writing about her own husband today. This problem came from an ACTUAL reader with an ACTUAL problem. Just so there’s no confusion or hurt feelings here… 😀

    Reply

  3. Dianna
    Mar 02, 2012 @ 14:22:48

    could possibly cause your husband to say some new and very interesting things. Yes – if I looked at my husband from that position, he would definitely say some new and interesting things….

    Reply

  4. Three Well Beings
    Mar 02, 2012 @ 23:29:08

    Mother Goose, I will give this some consideration, but I believe I may need to pass this good advice on to my husband. Do you think it will work for him? Or is this just direction for husband-listening? My husband is not someone who talks too much at all…but I can tell by the way his eyes occasionally glaze over that perhaps he needs some help remaining interested in what I have to say! Your advice is so necessary–keep up the good honking! Debra

    Reply

  5. yearstricken
    Mar 04, 2012 @ 15:39:05

    You make a terrific advice columnist!

    Reply

  6. eof737
    Mar 06, 2012 @ 12:51:19

    Welcome to the club… Do we lose hearing what the hub says or is it intentional? 😉

    Reply

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