Come Back to Reality, Mother Goose

Mother Goose apologizes for her delusional post yesterday, and would like to take this opportunity to ask your forgiveness if you or any member of your family was in any way, shape or form offended. In retrospect, I realize that I may have been over-honking my own importance in the general stream of life. My deepest and humblest and most sincere apologies if I have mislead you…

And now I’d like to talk about all the food I’ve eaten in the past four days.

As some of my dear readers may remember, Mother Goose has registered to run her first 5K race, and that big day is coming up very soon. As a matter of fact, there are only 45 more days until “The Race That’s Good For Life”. And believe me, Mother Goose is training hard — walking and running and walking and running nearly every five days or so… And then Mother Goose gets a fine appetite which must be satisfied in glorious new ways. I could simply eat more peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, more rice and beans, more granola bars and cheese. But no….

Here’s a quick overview of what Mother Goose has eaten since last Saturday.

From Lake Street Kitchen and Bar (Oak Park), we shared Wagyu Carpaccio (paper thin sliced beef with black garlic aioli) and Sweet Potato Latkes with guajillo pear sauce and anejo cheese.

It's cooked, right?

From Greek Islands (Chicago), we shared a fresh salad, Taramosalata (considered Greek caviar, this is a blend of cod roe with potatoes, onion and olive oil), and Mousaka (baked eggplant, ground meat and potato casserole topped with béchamel sauce).

Just open a jar of caviar for breakfast, dear.

From GT Fish and Oyster (Chicago), we were lavished with a five course romantic dinner and a bottle of fine white wine. Here’s where the natural foodie tendencies of the goose begin to kick in! Follow this if you will…

Course One — Hamachi and Tuna Crudo with heart of palm sorbet, yuzu vinaigrette
Course Two — Steamed Alaskan Halibut sided with crayfish cannelloni, cauliflower and burnt milk sauce
Course Three — Whittingham Farm Capon Breast with israeli couscous, rutabaga, hedgehog mushrooms
Course Four — Beef Tenderloin with beet flan, black truffle salsify
Course Five — Chocolate Praline Terrine with hazelnut ice cream, coffee sauce, candied hazelnuts

Dear readers, when Mother Goose first saw the menu for her special Valentine’s Day dinner, she became very nervous for several reasons. First of all, I did not know what most of these food items even are! Crudo? Terrine? Hamachi? Hedgehog mushrooms? Yuzu? Crayfish? Capon? Beet flan? Even though Mother Goose watches a lot of shows on the Food Network, these were mostly unfamiliar and unreal names for food.

It looked prettier on my plate.

Another problem was that I discovered a capon is actually a castrated rooster. With nothing better to do, they just sit around getting fat and lazy and tasty.

Prettier with feathers on...

My biggest problem was that earlier in the day, the restaurant actually posted a different menu online which included Foie Gras with the capon. I immediately began to get butterflies in my goose tummy to think of eating foie gras.

According to our friends at Wikipedia, “Foie gras is a food product made of the liver of a duck or goose that has been specially fattened. This fattening is typically achieved through gavage (force-feeding corn)…The technique of gavage dates as far back as 2500 BC, when the ancient Egyptians began keeping birds for food and deliberately fattened the birds through force-feeding…Gavage-based foie gras production is controversial due to the force feeding procedure used. A number of countries and other jurisdictions have laws against force feeding or the sale of foie gras.”

Imagine the horror! Gavage! Force-feeding corn to the goose in order to make her poor liver sweeter and tastier! What sort of culinary madness is this? I tell you, Mother Goose was beside herself with dread and anticipation of gastronomic disaster…

Fortunately, Executive Chef Giuseppe Tentori came to his senses before Mother Goose arrived at the scene and revised his romantic menu to easier accommodate my epicurean insecurities. Thank you, Chef Tentori! And our dinner was a honking success — we ate like royalty and the paparazzi gave us a break for the evening as well.

But now, Mother Goose must return to reality. With less than six weeks til my big race, I must truly focus on sensible eating to accompany my extensive exercise and training. For lunch today, I’ll be preparing and serving corn. I’ll have a light snack of corn in the afternoon, followed by a large portion of corn for dinner. Just before bed, I’ll heat up a little corn and nibble it whilst I watch Letterman. Tomorrow for breakfast, you guessed it….CORN. FORCE FEED CORN to the GOOSE?

Oh my gooseness…


7 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Three Well Beings
    Feb 15, 2012 @ 15:25:12

    I look forward to hearing more about your race! What a great goal! I guess if I would set a similar goal perhaps I could afford a few more calories! You’ll be relieved to know, however, that I do not like Foie GRAS! But I do like popcorn with Letterman 🙂 Debra


    • Natalie
      Feb 16, 2012 @ 09:07:05

      Debra, I looked at the images of the geese being force fed and it made me so sick. I’ve heard that many part of the U.S. have actually banned foie gras — I”m glad to know that…


  2. Bunn
    Feb 15, 2012 @ 18:16:01

    Oh man such yummy things have been on the goose menu! Mmmm mmmmm mmmmm!


  3. Dianna
    Feb 15, 2012 @ 19:49:17

    I’d much prefer a PB and J. (no offense!)


  4. yearstricken
    Feb 16, 2012 @ 21:11:51

    What a fantastic menu! A very special Valentine’s meal indeed.


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